Location
Mount Vernon, WA 98274
In a galaxy not so far away, an alien teenager named Zorblat has accidentally set the cosmos abuzz with their latest science project. What was supposed to be a simple experiment in interstellar propulsion has turned into a 130,000-mph cosmic spectacle, leaving Earth scientists scratching their heads and issuing warnings about potential alien threats.
“I just wanted to see if I could make a comet do a barrel roll,” Zorblat explained in an exclusive interview conducted via intergalactic telepathy.
What Zorblat didn’t mention was the real motivation behind the experiment: impressing a girl at school. “Her name is Glorbnella,” Zorblat admitted, his greenish cheeks turning a deeper shade of teal. “She loves flashy science projects, and I thought this would get her attention.”
Unfortunately, the plan went awry when the light of a nearby star reflected off Zorblat’s braces, momentarily blinding him and causing the comet to veer wildly off course. “I guess I should’ve worn my anti-glare helmet,” he added sheepishly. “I didn’t think anyone would notice.”
Notice they did. Harvard researchers, upon observing the object’s unusual speed and trajectory, speculated about its origins, even suggesting it could be a hostile alien probe. Little did they know, the truth was far less sinister and far more… adolescent.
Zorblat’s parents, who were initially proud of their young one’s scientific curiosity, are now dealing with the fallout. “We told Zorblat to clean up their space debris,” said their exasperated mother. “But do they listen? No. And now the humans are panicking.”
Meanwhile, Earth scientists continue to monitor the object, unaware that it is, in fact, a glitter-covered asteroid with “Zorblat’s Science Fair Project” etched into its surface. “It’s a learning experience,” Zorblat said. “Next time, I’ll aim for a less populated solar system.”
As for the humans, perhaps this incident will serve as a reminder that not every unexplained phenomenon is a cause for alarm. Sometimes, it’s just an alien teenager trying to pass intergalactic physics.
